digest the discomfort of an emotional hurt with time.

My Mind needed rest because my heart was pained. Many people say mind has nothing to do with heart but when the heart bleeds, the mind also denies to function actively. All liveliness is withdrawn & the individual slips into a state of indiffrence till the pain is absorbed completely. The best method to heal emotional hurts & agonies is to leave everything to the healing touch of time. With the flow of time all mental or emotional wounds heal up. This is the only effective remedy available with men when we think of pains other than physical. Some mental pains get healed up in a little time & some other emotional disturbances take a very long time to get cured. However, the effectiveness of time to cure mental agonies of men is undeniable.

I felt isolated for sometime in Baleswar. I was pained. My mind slowed its activity & started digesting the pain.When I was writing this blogpost I had frozen under a spell of emotional hurt and was standing silently to digest the discomfort of an emotional hurt.

16th November, 2010

16th November, 2010
Hustle and bustle started very early in the morning in my father’s-in-law. Even the night had not enough chance to pass by when all were stirred to activity. I opened my eyes in a half-sleepy state and found the taxi blowing its horn in front of the gate. Soon I realized that I have to move with my wife to the gynecologist for the routine check-up. Without taking a bath I got ready as soon as possible and waited for few minutes till my wife braced her up for the scheduled appointment. She took enough time as usual to undertake the make ups and wrapping up the saree. This time the situation was worse as the bulging abdomen was loudly revolting to disobey the outlines of the saree. The asymmetry took a long time to be resolved. However, by 5.30am we set out for Baleswar. The humpy and bumpy country road shined with unexpected pits and the vehicular motion gave enough jerks to everyone including the unborn. The situation warranted a long discourse of filthy languages for the Political leaders. India is a country which lacks many basic amenities for its people. We don’t have access to drinking water, healthcare, education, electricity and many more. Still we love our country because it is ours.
We reached Sri Ram Hospital. Luckily we were the first customer (patients) of the day. We were instructed by a security man to wait and not to leave the place as our absence will forfeit our serial number. We had not taken our breakfast so this stringent policy to keep the patients binding resulted another one hour delay in getting our dosas, vadas, idillis and sambar.
The doctor came. Had the sonograph of the foetus and uttered the word, “Normal”. I heaved a sigh of relief and counted Rs 6oo/- as the doctor’s fee. The would-be baby had travelled more than 55 kilometers to get sonographed. I mean the struggle for existence started before it lands on earth.
After spending sometime in the market of Baleswar, when we returned we were dog-tired. The pain on the part of a pregnant woman to journey hundreds of Kilometer to get basic medical care rightly explains the prosperity of modern India.

patriotic fervor and revolutionary zeal :need of the hour

India's economic growths in the last few years have drawn attention of world community but the general well-being of its people have not been bettered proportionately. The economic divide between the haves and the have-nots is still escalating. This incongruity raises some skeptical questions on the competency of bureaucracy and governance. . . . .

With some such thoughts in my mind I was journeying from Govindapally to Jeypore. For a moment I felt to do everything possible on my part to correct the flaws. The more deeply I pondered over the unsatisfactory prevailing situations, the more badly I was hurt. I felt helpless. As I am a man from the common mass who will heed to me? What coercion can I impose on the monolithic government? Shall I ally myself with the likeminded persons to make my voice audible? Will my fellow brothers and sisters stand by me casting aside their egos for a greater cause? I became desperately apprehensive of the general nature of India’s larger public. I thought and what I concluded that I write below.

Democracy is the best form of government but there are numerous unconstitutional byways for the power holders to befool the common mass. Lack of education, poverty, biased media and lack of suitable political alternatives restrict the efficacy of democracy to a large extent. Moreover, we are so pliable that we tend to be easily led by our noses and prefer to be fooled with tall promises. We never attempt to unite our voices so that an irresistible democratic force can be generated. We fail to do so because most of the persons who are now and then victimized by the indifference of an apathetic government ridiculously love to sit on their own ivory towers. They never exploit the power of democracy by forming a pressure group. No doubt, forming a pressure group requires strong sense of unity, fellow feeling and an open frame of mind and unfortunately we are not that great to cultivate such fine qualities of citizenship. But at present the gradually deteriorating national character warrants an urgent rejuvenation of our pre-independence patriotic fervor and revolutionary zeal.

Therefore, Shedding our little egos and self-interests we must accede to do what is right and desirable for the general benefit of the country. We may differ in opinion and beliefs but striving for the greater interest of the society collectively and honestly will pay rich dividends to our future generation. Moreover, the corrupt politicians and the unconcerned bureaucracy will be compelled to adjust with the changed scenario.

A person in power and responsibility

A person in power and responsibility must use his influence to enrich the lives of those who are the most deserving. Nepotism and favoritism should be avoided because they are antithesis to a life of morality. Man in power has to be sensitive enough to hear the subtle voice of conscience. The indication of his conscience should guide his way of life. He must be Idealistic and must have all conscious considerations before implementing a decision. Power comes with enormous responsibilities. A person who discharges his responsibilities in conformity with moral principles becomes an invincible life force for the humanity. The life of Mahatma Gandhi is a beacon light to such high standards of human existence.

What does our political leaders and bureaucrats do? Don't their hearts bleed at the sight of the poverty and wretchedness of life? Why do they turn a deaf ear when the deprived mass cry with empty stomach and heart full of grievances? Is it not their moral responsibility to endeavor honestly to sort out the problems of the common mass who have reposed their faith on the legislature and bureaucracy? The irony is that a person in power often goes into a deep slumber in his air-conditioned cosy chamber. And the high hopes of the deprived mass dash to the grounds.

Diwali 2010

Yesternight slowly I slipped into the celebration mood by 6.30pm. In the morning I was not enchanted with the festivity of Diwali.But Dr. Jayprakash,the V.S.of Khairput ringed and arranged a get to gether of friends in my quarter.I could not turn down his request.Sairam and shirish joined with us.The crackers were lit. Very safely we cracked the crackers.I was over cautious because I remembered my last year's burnt.A 2 meter long pipe was brought and the crackers were fixed at the tip of the pipe and from a good distance with the help of the pipe we lit them. It was really safe and more enjoying. After an hour we started preparing the dishes. I prepared Payas and J.P. cooked all other dishes.

My wife was in her paternal house.She missed me and was upset because since our marriage we have never celebrated Diwali together.In the night she was crying because of one or more reasons. I tried to console her,tried to understand her but failed. In some way the occassion was a mixture of happiness and pining for the loved ones.