Each day his hopes went on growing till the harvest time

Human sweat and blood mixed with the untilled soil. The labour, the aching muscles and a little rain sprouted into slender green leaves. With each day, new hopes grew in the form of the green plants. The sweating farmer looked smilingly at the growing crops and inhaled the fresh breeze that came over the undulating field.

The pulls of the bullocks, the weight of the plough and the commitment of the ploughman to the soil had all gone into the field to produce the food for the millions. The farmer hoped to present new clothes to his wife and child this season. He hoped to clear his debts. He hoped to live a life with a little warmth.

Each day his hopes went on growing till the harvest time but one day the sky announced a heavy rain with dark clouds and thunder bolts. His leaking roof had wetted the floor. A stream of muddy rain water was flowing by his half demolished hut and another farmer was listening to the radio that reported,” The continuous rain has devastated 20% of the crop of the country. The P.M. has called for a high-level meeting in this regard.”

The next day the local dailies published that the shattered hopes and utter desperation of a starving peasant ends in a bottle of poison.

(India is shinning but China issued separate visas to Indian citizens of Jammu and Kashmir. Mr. Barrack Obama declared India a developed country but onion is sold at Rs 70 per kilo. The precarious conditions of India need immediate solution. The persons at the helm of power have to rise from their slumber. Life is too short. They should not involve themselves in corruptions like 2G-spectrum. They have miles to take India before they pass the reigns to next generation. I love my India and I love even its corrupt politicians. But at the same time I would repeat the catch line of Shiv Khera that says, “COUNTRY FIRST”)

A peep into the future

I closed my physical eyes but with my mental eyes peeped into the future….into the far… far future. I stretched my hands to feel the beauty of the future. I viewed the next generation and my influences on them. I imagined what elements of my existence will be carried to the next generation and how that will manifest in improving life on the planet. I thought of the future where I am supposed to be no more in physical form but my life’s impulses may get a room if they manifest constant enrichment to human life in the non-material level.  

Each step taken in the present will bear on the future. A life in the womb expectantly looks at me to give him a better future.

I woke up from the future travel and my eyes caught the sight of the troubled present. I felt “I have miles to go, before I sleep.”

As a guide to the next generation I shall extend my touch to the future through the coming generation.

By coincidence or by my fate I am a teacher. And I will love to remain a teacher because the teachers affect eternity. They cannot say when their influences stop.

A slender river ran into a desert

A slender river ran into a desert and dried up somewhere in the sand dune. The thin line of Life vanished in the relentless dryness of an unfavourable nature. But before the river died, it had fed some date-palms with its life-giving waters. The river had breathed new life in a cluster of cactuses before it was lost in the sand dunes.


The cactuses with their spines and thick stems meditatively whispered the immortality of the river to the silent desert. The wind was silent but suddenly a sand storm was seen approaching. The silence escaped and the roar of the wind with numberless sand particles heaped on the cactuses. In the depths of the sand mountains, the cactuses and date palms waited for another upheaval so that they can come out once again to proclaim the greatness of the river, which had daunted the desert to reach at them.

Like the cactuses and the date palms in the hostile desert, creativity of man is struggling to overthrow the dictates of a mercenary society. When the dying river of humanity nourishes the creative pursuits of man, the essential nobility of man is stretched for another century. And there are enough reasons to hope for spiritual up gradation by the freshly extended time-frame.

spontaniety : the culmination of one's creativity.

Like the waves of a blue sea, the birds flew in the blue sky. The afternoon sun had coloured the landscape with a golden hue. I was standing with my eyes fixed at the distant sky.

I was struggling in these days to manifest my inner talents in all its spontaneity. The flow of spontaneity is a culmination of the creativity in an individual. When the creativity of man is released from the binding principles of a petty individuality, it resorts to some mysterious and queer faculties. Moreover, that mysterious pulses work miracles in the form of spontaneity. The expressions of the being are no more under the restrictions of a thinking consciousness. The individuality flashes with a divine intuitive lustre and life assumes all simplicity.

I shut my eyes and lost my being in the vastness of the sky. I disintegrated and my ego started to dissolve in the deep silence of mind and spirit. I felt the sky in me. I felt the freedom of birds in me. I felt the shine of the sun in my being. I embraced the all world with my all-absorbing new expansion.

The vibes of tremendous energy is ever revolving in and around the man to usher him the glimpse of the divine. And I learnt just to be receptive to enjoy the power of spontaneity.

A temple of love

By the evening, I was completely exhausted. I had taken a daylong strain to keep myself active in the conference and by the evening, I had been completely spent up. I walked along with my other friends to refresh myself. On the busy roads of Bhubaneswar, through the heavy traffic I headed with my friends to the ISKON temple. The visit to the temple seemed suitable because man needs peace to recharge in a serene atmosphere.


Although the temple stands by the side of a busy road, the spacious structures of the temple put the mental fatigue aside to a little degree.

I sat on one of the benches of the temple. A pair of young boy and girl was sitting on the opposite bench to me. I felt happy to see them that the temple atmosphere is rightly conducive to carry on their exchange of feelings, which may culminate into a deep bond of love in future.

In the state capital, the temple provides free space, a delicious prasadam canteen, jingling bells and cymbals with incessant chanting of HARE RAM HARE KRISHNA..... Mahamantra. The public institution spreads the message of love and the serious love that goes in the talking of the pair in front of me made me think seriously that such institutions are essential for broadening our views related to love and sex.

we live in the company of complexities

The world moves very fast in a mechanical speed. We constitue the world and as a result we are also moving in a breakneck pace. We realize the truth when the machine breaks down and the human beings, who are half machine with the metallic goliaths, stand on their knees until the machines are repaired and life once again gains its speed. The irony is that flashing speed is now our normal pace of lifestyle.


On 20th Dec, my day seemed completely at stake when the engine of my train gave a choked cry and broke down in the mid-way. I was moving from Baleswar to Bhubaneswar. I was running short of time and reaching the training hall in time seemed a wild dream. I felt I am helpless. I had little in my hands to do anything. At last, I left all thoughts and waited patiently to see what happens next.

I reached the training hall at 1pm.

Meetings, planning, training sessions and wild rush on the roads mark the life of modern man. Long hours of gazing at the computer screens have eliminated the innocent joy of gazing at the stars in a clear night. We live in the company of complexities but forget the beauty of simplicity and genuine human earnestness.

A visit not to pray but to eat.

With a view to eating delicious food we four gathered in the ISKON temple. The day had merged in the evening and beautiful sankirtan and the face of youthful people had filled the occassion. Enjoyin Vada and rassagula with doses of sankirtanam will remind me that I was happy in the evening.

In a journey, life reveals many secrets.

In a journey, life reveals many secrets.


Yesterday, on the website of ‘OBOOKO’ I read a statement that ‘There is a book in every man.’ I took the statement not so seriously, although I had appreciated the idea. But I learnt the truth by spirit when I moved to jaypore on a ramshackle bus on 18th December, 2010. This happened so......

While journeying we take all our vanities with us. We board the bus, the train, or the plane with expressions of tremendous self-importance. It is common among many qualified people to pose an air of superiority when they travel in a public-transport-vehicle, where most of the co-passengers are unknown faces. I have always felt so in me and that day was no exception.

I was sitting silently lost in numerous thoughts of my family, outstanding loans, petty salary, unrealised dreams and so on.

By my side the W.E.O. (welfare extension officer) of Khairput Block was sitting. His tongue was restlessly producing words to declare that he is an administrator and the identity of a lecturer is woefully the least before his job because his job has power and enough sources of income apart from the monthly salary.

His boasting tendency rang a bell in my mind. And I remembered many instances when I have sung my own praises before others. Such memories made me think, ‘I am no better than he is’.

I kept silent to his boastful words.

His snobbishness also reminded me how we struggle throughout our lives to prove that I AM THE GREAT. However, the irony is that we spare no efforts to put a label of GREATNESS outwardly, whereas the inner being is gradually degenerating.

The wheels of the bus rolled down. The wind from the side window swept away most of the officer’s proud words. My mind responded lesser and lesser to his utterances. I deliberately cocooned myself in my own thoughts so as not to listen his boastful words any more. In the mean while an old acquaintance of the officer’s, who was in my hind seat handed over a book and asked my comments on it. A cursory look over the pages made my heart throb in appreciation of the seemingly original work on the tribal community of undivided Koraput.

Out of curiosity when I inquired about the author, I found that the writer is none but the co-passenger who had handed me the book. My feelings of genuine surprise turned to utter amazement, when I learnt that the writer is a driver by profession.

It is our general belief that driving the machines turns a man into a machine-Lifeless and mechanical. We expect that the drivers are meant to respond to speed and traffic signals or at best, they are reflexive. But when a driver goes beyond the normal expectation of the society and can write an likeable book, he forces everyone never to underestimate human capabilities. The unconventionality manifests newer hopes to them who are constantly hurt by the so-called big shots of society.

Smilingly, I looked at the W.E.O and asked, “How many books have you written, sir? You work for the tribal community and what is your contribution to their art and literature?” He listened what I had asked but deliberately looked out of the window at the green trees, that seemed running hind ward as the bus moved ahead.

I got inspired with my own words.

I did not care the chilling cold. My mind prompted and my heart whispered me to set out for the hostel inmates. I opened up my heart’s feelings before the boarders and asked for their complete co-operation to make the up-coming sports meet a grand success. I inspired and at the same time, I got inspired with my own words.


You cannot brighten someone’s path without brightening yours.

I left the hostel auditorium. It was 8pm of wintery December. I came out to the vacant road. The inspiration continued to work in me.

For a moment, the world stopped around me. I became emotional because for two long years I have remained attached with the young boys and girls, all hailing from the lower strata of the society. Today they are sitting in front of me and listening with rapt attention to each word I utter. Tomorrow they will be distant stars whom I can see but I may not touch. Today they are sitting by my side with their body wrapped in woollen clothes but in a year, they will be the travellers whose trains have left my station and have moved ahead. Although in the coming days, I will still be engaged in like a stationmaster, still regulating the passage of other trains approaching successively, they will get down in a newer world carrying my message and my soul’s touch.

I brooded whether I am packing up the right stuff for the modern generation in the tender minds. I became unsure, terribly unsure of my capability.

The night seemed darker and the road seemed lonelier. I stood alone. Looking at the night sky, I raised my hands upward. The chilling cold kissed my hands. Dewdrops percolated my head though my hair. I closed my eyes, with two drops of tears rolling down, begged Goddess Saraswati to spread her whiteness overpowering my darkly littleness.

she will ever dazzle as a deity of love- a story

When I look back into the past to relive my bygone days, my memory betrays. I fail to remember clearly how that girl was like an inseparable shadow of me. I faintly remember those moments but get deeply nostalgic because I cannot preserve those moments. They are gradually fading from my mind leaving my heart blank. The slow but sure loss of my past feelings is making me hollow day by day.

Today, I am pained because after my marriage to another girl, my days are passing one by one and her memory is slowly disintegrating from my mind. It is not that I am unhappy with my marriage but I do not like to forget her numerous impressions, smiles, sacrifices, embraces, tears, kisses and the moments that we had shared together.

The painful truth is that human memory is fallible. It is devised to forget. I am also no exception. I very much realize how the waves of ruthless time has started to corrode many of her sweet memories from my mind. Now, I cannot remember those very incidents, which had deepened our relations gradually. I cannot remember when I first kissed her. I cannot remember when for the first time we had cried together holding each other tightly. I cannot remember on which occasions we had been to the seashore. I cannot remember how she cooked my food and washed my clothes and readied me for the annual function in the college. I cannot remember those numerous day-to-day happenings that had made her my sweet heart.

However, something of her will always remain in my life like indestructible particles until my last breath. It is because in her softness, I had first known the pangs and the giggling of love.

My mind may forget everything about her but my heart has preserved something precious about her, which neither time nor a failing memory can ever tarnish. Moreover, she will ever dazzle as a deity of love in my mental sky for all times to come.

IT IS BETTER TO BE TRUSTED THAN TO BE LOVED.

It is a great thing to keep one’s own words. If you commit something to someone, follow it with all your devotion. Because hope keeps the world going and shattered hopes, beget the criminals. A man who hopes and believes in the kindness and nobility of society can never become antisocial. Hence, the moral responsibility of each man on earth is to keep the light of hope ever burning in the hearts of every man.


With the word commitment, I remember the famous lines of Salman Khan, which he utters in the movie WANTED: “When I commit something, I never listen even to myself.”

Now the question is why commitment is so necessary in life. It is because commitment of one man kindles the candle of hope of another man. When hope of a man is fulfilled, it generates trust and trust is better than love.

In my college time, I loved a girl. She used to write very emotional and beautiful letters to me. The fine expressions of her letters used to export me to the other worlds. Until date, I believe that those imaginative flights and ecstasy are beyond all human description. I used to experience as if life was lived in an altogether different plane. However, god cannot tolerate when your love exceeds his expectations. Suddenly, the entire world went up side down. One day her uncle along with some muscular men surrounded me in college and demanded those letters from me. I could have evaded them but I did not do so. I handed them those securely preserved love-letters. I did so not out of fear but with an intention to make them aware that, the love affair is not one-sided. However, my every calculation went wrong. In home, my ladylove was severely beaten and her study was stopped for a month. That one month of separation was really excruciating. It was just like nursing a stabbed heart with the killer knife still inside. I was terribly upset at the so serious turn of the love affair.

One fine morning in the college campus, I detected my sweet heart after a long gap of 46 days. My joy knew no bounds. There was an upsurge of adrenalin in my whole being. Nevertheless, I did not venture to meet him lest her moustachioed uncle was guarding her. I could not sit in the class and I moved on the corridors in search of her. My eyes stopped at the college library counter. I caught a glimpse of her. She tried to ignore me. However, I went to her. Before I could speak anything to her, she painfully stated, “No explanations, I may love you but I do not trust you” and went past by my side. I was dumb-found. Tears rolled down because I realized that I have lost my credibility as a lover.

The incident taught me that IT IS BETTER TO BE TRUSTED THAN TO BE LOVED.

man is sensitive enough to respond to sweet words.

Yesterday I had been to the dentist. He took my money and a tooth and in return gave an excruciating pain. Next day in the morning, when I smiled in front of the mirror, I could see a side view of my buccal chamber through the newly formed gap. In the serially lined up white teeth, a member was missing. I resembled an old man. Instantly, I thought of my little baby who is yet to approach on earth. I wondered that she/he will initially express his joy in teeth less laughs and now I am slowly following his/her trail to do so. Smiling with no teeth!


Yesterday the dentist scolded me severely for tearing a part of his prescription. Unintentionally I had made the mistake. The situation was such that I urgently required a piece of paper to write down my Father’s in law bank account number. My wife was on the mobile. I was on the seat of my bike in the midst of heavy traffic and that prescription was the only available paper with me. Moreover, the dentist had left a considerable part of the prescription blank and I thought to use it.

Whatever may be, I admit that the dentist’s annoyance was justified because I had disrespected his profession but his reaction seemed to me an over dose. He became somewhat aggressive and flung hard words of admonition. I was pained but kept quite. At the very moment, his son who was sitting on the dentist’s lap started playing with the x-ray films of my ailing teeth. Suddenly I took notice of the situation and announced to the boy “Hey baby, don’t play with the x-ray films it is a disrespect to your Papa’s profession”. The doctor looked straight to me but I smiled internally because,”To err is human, to forgive is divine.” The dentist will not mind his son’s behaviour because his son is a part of him. However, he will not spare a patient because the patient is someone else to be admonished and prove doctor’s superiority. The life is like this. We derive pleasure when we crush somebody’s self-esteem.

The moral of the story is we all must be tolerant to other’s flaws and at the same time; we must use only the soft chords to bring a change and not hard words to teach a lesson.

As a teacher, I resolve to bring about changes in my students by the method of persuasion and not by punishment because man is sensitive enough to respond to sweet words.

Dark with excessive brightness

In our B.A. class, our teacher had given a very good example of paradox. To explain his point he quoted a line, which runs thus: Dark with excessive brightness. Today I feel this line is best applicable to internet. In a short time, we are exposed to so much information that we had to spend most of the time in selecting what to read for our benefit. As a result, the human attention span is greatly reduced. A cursory glance to the HTTPs suddenly sets off a violent pace to reject the material at hand and constantly makes the attention to wander through the plethora of web pages. Such habits are causing dissatisfaction because we never derive the satisfaction of mindful reading. In addition, our movements in the vast expanse of cyberspace are often associated with too many diversions. The electronic screen and numerous pop up ads exacerbate the disgust.

The melody of the soul, when the eyes are engaged in filling the mind serenely with the pages of a single book in hand, is disappearing. Mind has become a restless monkey with immense freedom.

Yesterday, one of my best friends requested me not to write long text messages. The problem with him is that he cannot gather the required patience to read long messages. It is quite true that lack of patience and mental concentration is a growing trait among the ultra-moderns. The busy and competitive lifestyle has made us slide over the fine things of life unconcerned. We fail to observe and notice that how beautiful life is. We are dazzled by the outer world and ignore what life whispers in our ears about itself.

Today we talk in SMS and our next generation will surely switch over to VSMS (Very Short Messaging Service). Nevertheless, I would interpret that VSMS will stand for ‘Vanishing Sensibility Messaging Standards’.

Tum Mere Kaun Ho.

A beautiful damsel and a handsome guy who are bubbling with all liveliness represent an extra-ordinary love relation in Yahan Mey Ghar Ghar Kheli (daily soap of ZEE TV). The passion gets heavenly with the background song ' TUM MERE KAUN HO'. The song touches the soul and it must be appreciated.

But.... But..... My quest for the beautiful song resulted in utter disapointment. In spite of persistent web search which even continued for a fortnight, I could not find a genuine download link. . All my search seemed futile. I was unable to reach at my right destination. Numerous sites popped that encased my interest for their gains but in the end I was made to end in some unwanted site.

At last I realized that I am wandering at the distant unknown but missing something obvious. I clicked the official website of ZeeTv and hit the bulls eye.

I love the song so much that I would like to provide the down link page address in the post. Moreover, I attach the song also with this post.


DOWNLOAD PAGE where the download link is shown.

http://www.zeetv.com/shows/yahan-main-ghar-ghar-kheli/download.html

7th December, A night shivering with cold wave and rain.

Persistent rain and freezing cold-wave had worsened the weather for the last 2 days and today the bad weather had reached its peak. As a result  I remained indoors all day long and when I opened the door of my room I found that the day light had already stepped aside making room for a dark chilly evening. Every where an utter darkness prevailed because there was  a major power failure in the village.  I groped my way to my neighbour Sairam's house. We decided to eat out. Although it was raining and the cold wind was cutting our flesh ,we set on bike to the hotel. The hotel owner welcomed us with a customary smile but we were bitterly disappointed when we discovered that the hotel has neither Chapati nor Roti for dinner. We returned home wet and shivering in the wintry rain.

We started cooking and prepared Chapati in 30minutes. The dinner was not bad. I returned my home with a 3/4th filled stomach. Opening the door, readily I occupied my bed and embraced its warmth and then the cosy bed induced me to mention about my day-long struggle against the ruthless weather. 

In the day time I had been invited by Mr.Sanjaya for lunch. He invited me because some guests who were expected to come to his home that afternoon did not show up. And the excess of food prepared for them fell on my share. 

The characteristics of today's weather were best explained by Mr.Tanmay's SMS ,which runs like this:

God is in Dabbang Mood," Hum tumhari city mey aisa climate create karenge ki confuse ho jaoge ke RAINCOAT pahene ya SWEATER.

ramblings on 5th December.

With severe toothache, I had frozen in the evening. That evening was rather motionless. The Naxals had announced for PLGA week celebration and all the bus services to the Malkangir district had frozen like my aching tooth. There was little traffic on the rough and rutted roads, which are very much the characteristic of developing India. The evening less by vehicular noise was putting up an eerie silence. And the toothache.......


My wife phoned me. She complained me of stomach pain and my little one's movement in the uterus. In these days the foetus had been a lively moving happiness to me. So even in my toothache I smiled from my heart. I realized that with every pain, a happy smile may get associated. However, I will uproot my tooth the next day. My wife will give birth to a new possibility. We shall do our best to make out a quality life. But I ponder who will subside the terrorizing silence of this December evening?

I went to Jayant uncle's home to take my dinner. I did not cook my food because I had to attend my toothache and internet. I had a hearty meal and while returning to my quarter I popped into Sairam's, the chemistry lecturer's cabin. He was on all his fours over a book. His serious concentration on the action at hand baffled me. He revealed his deep longing to leave the place. Therefore, he had to study hard to find some other job. I admired his efforts and at the same time felt that he has enough reason to be dissatisfied with life in a district where man-made accidents may happen at any time.

My phone rang. It was a happy diversion to mind. Roy sir had made the call. He was elated to express about his activated subscription in the Google sms channel. He was on the way to his home-town for attending his nephew's marriage. How happy he was!

I was the only vegetarian sitting between the two chemistry lecturers who were happily relishing non-veg meals. They were eating up non-veg items and I was talking in loud voice non-veg items. There was not much difference among us because some great man has rightly said that talking filthy things pollute the mind and soul. It is more harmful then poison.

A great show was being telecast in the evening. The musicians of India were awarded for their contributions to the music world. In a section of the show Usha Utthup was seen crying out of excess of emotion. Good thing! Tears and music are old companions.

I have a small world. If you continue to read my blog posts constantly you will now every character by name and their nature. Nevertheless, my question is why you will show so much generous interest in me and my world. The answer will make sense if we think each other as companions in the life journey. So you scratch my back and I shall yours. So let us live and let live others. It is too late to sleep. But before I close my eyes and invite my dream world, I like you to plant a tree. It is because in the end I may be selfish and may kick your buttocks but in the hot summers when global warming pounds the vilest hot waves, the green tree will provide you a shady place to keep your hurt buttocks in peace.

Some write ups for the soul

Everyday people like me are cluttering the web with their views, opinions ideas and a few facts too. But the thoughts and the contents most often fall into the level of mediocrity. The same thing also happens even in the print media. Books, journals and a heavy deal of reading materials are poured into the glittering shops for the general public.

As a reader, we constantly get confused in choosing our reading material. It is because in a busy and hectic life of a fast moving world we can not afford our time to read something which is not highly beneficial to us. So we expect from the writers or any litterateur to write something for the soul. In the modern times, our minds have been digitalized in the company of computers and all short of electronic gadgets. Moreover, the pulsating heart, which once used to symbolize our fine emotions, has now reduced to a lump of flesh which is now only functional for the physical body. The greatest requirement of the modern man is humanity, which has sunk into oblivion.

Strong waves of inspiration and human sensibility are needed plentifully to refurbish the lost souls. The minds on the web or on the print are required to replete the systems with so much positives that the negatives in the world will seem negligible.

A petty headache and its petty cause.

I have a terrible headache since last night and its origin goes back to two days before when Jayaprakashji came to Govindapally and we conducted a small party. By party we mean cooking together and eating  together (but never drinking)  and strengthening the bond of friendship.

That night Mr.Jayaprakash talked to me about his unsuccessful marriage proposal with Monalisa.He recounted vividly about his likings for the girl and mentioned how on some compatibility issues the  marriage proposal was dropped. My friend gave all the minute details of the progress of the proposal and its end-product which was akin to a  LJBF (Let's Just Be Friends)relation.

Mr Jayaprakash is now out of the painful heartache of the proposal. However, in some corner of his heart he had an indelible memory of the happenings. That night I patiently heard those sweet and bitter memories and slept at 1pm. In the morning I felt a headache and that continues till date. .......... I took a pill just 2 hours before and feel somewhat relieved.

Thakkar Bappa's Birth Aniversary

Today is Thakkar Bappa's birth aniversary and  the ST and SC development department of Orissa state observes the day in all its educational institutions. To commemorate the birth anniversary of Thakkar Bappa our college also declared a holiday and convened a meeting. In order to brace myself up for the meeting  I searched the Internet yesterday to find information about this great man but the outcome was very slender. I could not find any substantial information about his life and achievements. However, my interaction with other staff next day convinced me that I am better known about Thakkar Bappa than they know about him.

With a view to attending the meeting I came to college a little earlier. I was alone in the administrative block, sitting alone in front of a computer. Two boys came and asked my permission to go out of the campus to buy some items. I granted them the permission and they went away. I became alone once again. Few minutes latter another student approached me and stood silently before me. I presumed that this student has also come to ask my permission to go out. But his long silence more than the normal behaviour pattern drew my inquisitiveness. I withdrew my eyes from the computer screen and looked at the boy . His eyes spoke more than his tongue could. In a friendly tone I asked, "What can I do for you.". He gave a short reply, "Nothing,Sir." But he was on the verge of crying. In a deep painful tone intimated that he could not pursue his studies because he has a diseased father. He had to work as a labourer to feed his family. Even though the Government is providing facilities for food and study to the tribal students they have their own set of compulsion which looms larger than all welfare programmes in Orissa. If some income generating activities are added with regular class-room education a lasting solution to such problems can be found.

Never be in conflict with your moral values

Since the time when the human child becomes conscious of the outer world, he assimilates a number of influences and impressions which go in forming his life's general philosophy.The society is such a machinery which instills and teaches a lot of  social principles & human values. Such intrinsic human values and moral principles always show their presence in our mind . They subtly influence us.

Our life's activities can cause great mental conflict in us when they go against our own acquired value-systems. Such contrasting activities or actions in life shatter our whole-being and weaken our will-power and spiritual forces. Therefore the journey to greatness must be in conformity with the general moral principles of life. Any violation to our own preset value-systems lower our dignity in our own eyes and we suffer a psychological fragmentation.

Life finds a greater expression when the moral force of an individual keeps in line with his activities and life's missions.

A life lived within the limitations of self interests may not draw upon  moral strength.Because you don't require an atom bomb to blast a rock. A dynamite can achieve that not-so-great result. But events of greater dimensions necessitate greater force. similarly, the lowly thoughts of human mind revolving around a single individual may go without the endorsements of moral values but a powerful thought can never assume its revolutionary and ennobling potentialities unless it is accompanied by a right moral attitude.The more are we restricted in setting the goals of life , the lesser becomes the need for moral evolution.But inculcating a moral value system in life opens the petals of all other divine virtues.

Ailing roads causing ailments

The KBK districts of Orissa are the most interior regions of the state. It has very poor communication facilities. Underdeveloped railway connectivity and poor road service mark the sorry state of the districts. The state capital Bhubaneswar is at an enormous distance of 700 hundred Kilometres from the southernmost district head quarter of KBK districts. A single journey over the rough roads to the capital can make any healthy person ill. Recently one of our staff had been to Berhampur on the grounds of Medical treatment. After being cured of his ailments when he returned from Berhampur his health condition once again deteriorated severely because of the awful long journey. As a result, he was made to rush to the hospital again.

Since the month of September 2010 my wife, who is an expectant mother, is in her paternal home because I cannot provide her adequate medical facility at this place. Yesterday I was chitchatting at a local beetle shop. The shopkeeper proudly showed me a photograph, which was published in a daily local paper. The shopkeeper had clicked that photograph that showed an ailing patient being carried by four men on a cot to the near-by hospital. The published photo was loudly proclaiming that: We do not have ambulance; if we have ambulance, we do not have roads; if we have roads, we do not have doctors; we have many ‘Nots’ because we are the Havenots.

The lack of connectivity and good road system has an indirect benefit. It is that once we come to this interior pockets we stay in the place for months together. My colleagues who are working with me in the same college take extra classes on most Sundays because Sundays have no meaning to them. On Sundays, they cannot go to their hometown. The distance and the tiresome journey desist everyone ( my colleagues) to remain in the headquarters. So it becomes more sensible for us to engage ourselves in doing our duty even on Sundays as the most pleasant form of diversion. However, the irony is that in spite of our committed service the Government is never pleased to allow us the KBK allowance. Nevertheless, this allowance is provided to other service holders of the region. In Orissa, the teachers are the most neglected community.

Atmaprakash Nayak has invited you to join Rediff MyPage

rediff.com

---

Hi, I would like to add you as a friend on Rediff MyPage, a great place to keep in touch with friends, post photos and videos. Add me as friend Cheers, Atmaprakash Nayak

---

Thinking habit is a powerful tool to unleash the latent potentialities of an individual. Taking a little physical exercise, reading good books, listening to positive thoughts and developing the power of concentration can take an individual to newer heights. Life's possibilities can be explored only by holding the steering wheel of the mind consciously and directing its movement meticulously towards the higher aspects of life. Above all the wise technique of avoiding all lowly and degenerating thoughts from mind enhances the true beauty of life.

digest the discomfort of an emotional hurt with time.

My Mind needed rest because my heart was pained. Many people say mind has nothing to do with heart but when the heart bleeds, the mind also denies to function actively. All liveliness is withdrawn & the individual slips into a state of indiffrence till the pain is absorbed completely. The best method to heal emotional hurts & agonies is to leave everything to the healing touch of time. With the flow of time all mental or emotional wounds heal up. This is the only effective remedy available with men when we think of pains other than physical. Some mental pains get healed up in a little time & some other emotional disturbances take a very long time to get cured. However, the effectiveness of time to cure mental agonies of men is undeniable.

I felt isolated for sometime in Baleswar. I was pained. My mind slowed its activity & started digesting the pain.When I was writing this blogpost I had frozen under a spell of emotional hurt and was standing silently to digest the discomfort of an emotional hurt.

16th November, 2010

16th November, 2010
Hustle and bustle started very early in the morning in my father’s-in-law. Even the night had not enough chance to pass by when all were stirred to activity. I opened my eyes in a half-sleepy state and found the taxi blowing its horn in front of the gate. Soon I realized that I have to move with my wife to the gynecologist for the routine check-up. Without taking a bath I got ready as soon as possible and waited for few minutes till my wife braced her up for the scheduled appointment. She took enough time as usual to undertake the make ups and wrapping up the saree. This time the situation was worse as the bulging abdomen was loudly revolting to disobey the outlines of the saree. The asymmetry took a long time to be resolved. However, by 5.30am we set out for Baleswar. The humpy and bumpy country road shined with unexpected pits and the vehicular motion gave enough jerks to everyone including the unborn. The situation warranted a long discourse of filthy languages for the Political leaders. India is a country which lacks many basic amenities for its people. We don’t have access to drinking water, healthcare, education, electricity and many more. Still we love our country because it is ours.
We reached Sri Ram Hospital. Luckily we were the first customer (patients) of the day. We were instructed by a security man to wait and not to leave the place as our absence will forfeit our serial number. We had not taken our breakfast so this stringent policy to keep the patients binding resulted another one hour delay in getting our dosas, vadas, idillis and sambar.
The doctor came. Had the sonograph of the foetus and uttered the word, “Normal”. I heaved a sigh of relief and counted Rs 6oo/- as the doctor’s fee. The would-be baby had travelled more than 55 kilometers to get sonographed. I mean the struggle for existence started before it lands on earth.
After spending sometime in the market of Baleswar, when we returned we were dog-tired. The pain on the part of a pregnant woman to journey hundreds of Kilometer to get basic medical care rightly explains the prosperity of modern India.

patriotic fervor and revolutionary zeal :need of the hour

India's economic growths in the last few years have drawn attention of world community but the general well-being of its people have not been bettered proportionately. The economic divide between the haves and the have-nots is still escalating. This incongruity raises some skeptical questions on the competency of bureaucracy and governance. . . . .

With some such thoughts in my mind I was journeying from Govindapally to Jeypore. For a moment I felt to do everything possible on my part to correct the flaws. The more deeply I pondered over the unsatisfactory prevailing situations, the more badly I was hurt. I felt helpless. As I am a man from the common mass who will heed to me? What coercion can I impose on the monolithic government? Shall I ally myself with the likeminded persons to make my voice audible? Will my fellow brothers and sisters stand by me casting aside their egos for a greater cause? I became desperately apprehensive of the general nature of India’s larger public. I thought and what I concluded that I write below.

Democracy is the best form of government but there are numerous unconstitutional byways for the power holders to befool the common mass. Lack of education, poverty, biased media and lack of suitable political alternatives restrict the efficacy of democracy to a large extent. Moreover, we are so pliable that we tend to be easily led by our noses and prefer to be fooled with tall promises. We never attempt to unite our voices so that an irresistible democratic force can be generated. We fail to do so because most of the persons who are now and then victimized by the indifference of an apathetic government ridiculously love to sit on their own ivory towers. They never exploit the power of democracy by forming a pressure group. No doubt, forming a pressure group requires strong sense of unity, fellow feeling and an open frame of mind and unfortunately we are not that great to cultivate such fine qualities of citizenship. But at present the gradually deteriorating national character warrants an urgent rejuvenation of our pre-independence patriotic fervor and revolutionary zeal.

Therefore, Shedding our little egos and self-interests we must accede to do what is right and desirable for the general benefit of the country. We may differ in opinion and beliefs but striving for the greater interest of the society collectively and honestly will pay rich dividends to our future generation. Moreover, the corrupt politicians and the unconcerned bureaucracy will be compelled to adjust with the changed scenario.

A person in power and responsibility

A person in power and responsibility must use his influence to enrich the lives of those who are the most deserving. Nepotism and favoritism should be avoided because they are antithesis to a life of morality. Man in power has to be sensitive enough to hear the subtle voice of conscience. The indication of his conscience should guide his way of life. He must be Idealistic and must have all conscious considerations before implementing a decision. Power comes with enormous responsibilities. A person who discharges his responsibilities in conformity with moral principles becomes an invincible life force for the humanity. The life of Mahatma Gandhi is a beacon light to such high standards of human existence.

What does our political leaders and bureaucrats do? Don't their hearts bleed at the sight of the poverty and wretchedness of life? Why do they turn a deaf ear when the deprived mass cry with empty stomach and heart full of grievances? Is it not their moral responsibility to endeavor honestly to sort out the problems of the common mass who have reposed their faith on the legislature and bureaucracy? The irony is that a person in power often goes into a deep slumber in his air-conditioned cosy chamber. And the high hopes of the deprived mass dash to the grounds.

Diwali 2010

Yesternight slowly I slipped into the celebration mood by 6.30pm. In the morning I was not enchanted with the festivity of Diwali.But Dr. Jayprakash,the V.S.of Khairput ringed and arranged a get to gether of friends in my quarter.I could not turn down his request.Sairam and shirish joined with us.The crackers were lit. Very safely we cracked the crackers.I was over cautious because I remembered my last year's burnt.A 2 meter long pipe was brought and the crackers were fixed at the tip of the pipe and from a good distance with the help of the pipe we lit them. It was really safe and more enjoying. After an hour we started preparing the dishes. I prepared Payas and J.P. cooked all other dishes.

My wife was in her paternal house.She missed me and was upset because since our marriage we have never celebrated Diwali together.In the night she was crying because of one or more reasons. I tried to console her,tried to understand her but failed. In some way the occassion was a mixture of happiness and pining for the loved ones.

I shall live and enjoy my constant evolvement

With crossed fingers and a meditative mind I sat vigilantly to catch my rising thoughts which may benefit me later. I became silent and sensitive to the faintly whispering voices within me. I drew myself from the outer distractions and listened carefully to my inner voice. I started a monologue and got flashing responses. My being responded and my mind started to dictate the mental waves in word equivalents. The fingers typed and the dreams took lively forms.I am happy because I am not blank. I am happy because I am sensitive. I am responding to my self in my thought level. I am able to create or recycle human intelligence. I am a part of the infinite intelligence and I keep contact with that bountiful source of life. So my improvement in the thought level is inevitable. I won't become a corpse. I shall live and enjoy my constant evolvement.

Reopening The Doors to Spiritual Bliss

Moving on the sandy sea of desert, water can not be obtained.Treading over the cushion of sense-pleasure, the nectar of life can not be tested.Most often what we aspire for remain elusive beause the approaches adopted to reah at them are wrong.

Vivekananda beautifully reminds us this truth when he says, "All help comes from inside and not from outside." We are lost in the burning heats and the blinding flashes of the outside desert so absorbingly that we become blind to the inner fountain of joy which ever flows inside of every human soul.We just need to reopen the doors of our heart to this inner wealth of spiritual joy.

The reoppening of the doors of our hearts is simply a new angle of pereption which will help realize the true beauty and meaning of our existence..In the mercenary ativities of life we forget the simple joys of life. We knowingly get confused and befooled in the trivial affairs of life only to avoid the divine joy of a spiritual living.We know it better that a little intoxiation of spiritual bliss can dissolve our petty egoes and can thus enforce a higher form of spiritual living. But we deliberately keep clinging to our miniature self because we fear expansion. Expansion will disintegrate and dissolve our lowly self.But we love our lowly self so dearly that we constantly avoid the invitations of all sacred calls of almighty.So What we need is a reopenning of doors to our own spiritual bliss which we have inherited as the child of God. So let us do it and be happy inwardly.

verifying code of technorati N4ZMV7EFSK9Q

A gloomy Introspection (a short story)

There was that age old banyan tree and that summer afternoon silently with eyes closed Samar was lost in a mental world where he glided from one crest to another crest of his past life. His past life as a Post Graduate student of Berhampur University appeared to take evanescent forms. The memories reeled and his heart pumped more blood as he relived the past.

He remembered his obsolete and thereby unique 1978 modeled Yezdi Motor Bike which had been his faithful companion in those days. Nobody used to ride such a old model bike by that time. It used to consume a lot of petrol and used to make a lot of noise while moving past road. He also remembered how few girls pressed their ears at the sound of his motor-cycle in mockery. The students of his time had adopted 4-stroke bikes but he was not financially well-off to replace his 2-stroke Yezdi Motor cycle and buy a new bike. As a private tutor he used to earn a paltry amount but never stopped enjoying life. Although there were occasional hardships but he had never been distressed beyond toleration.Life was from hand to mouth and seemed to perpetuate in that same monotonous fashion till his last breath.
The memory of his girl friend flashed out in his mind. Now she was a distant dream. The time changed rapidly and his girl friend drifted away in some unknown direction. He had neither any regret about it nor any expectation from her but he wished he could have been more affectionate and understanding towards her when she was with him. He felt miserable because he had lost her and now he could not amend his ruthless past behavior which he had shown to her. She was a fine girl. She had clung to him in spite of numerous ups and downs but finally he had betrayed her. That was his life and he felt burdened because he could not be also a good lover.

Man loves to think that he is perfect and he labels all external forces as the conspirators who are constantly robbing him of his perfection. For the last 9years Samar had blamed everyone and everything except for himself for his unrealized dreams and his sad life. But a long period of gloomy introspection convinced him to blame none but him.

After getting a post graduate degree he appeared numerous interviews. Because of his smartness and pleasant demeanor he clicked in many trivial jobs but he could not achieve anything substantial. It is because Life needs a background of thorough preparation before granting someone with an enormous success. He lacked that thorough preparation. He believed vainly that he is unparalleled and outstanding and he missed requisite hard labour. As a result his life languished on the run way and could not take off into the limitless blue sky. A lot of potentialities could not bloom. The life of Samar showed a downward curve.

A lot of young men with enormous potentialities pass the world unnoticed and unknown because they never felt that hard labour is that which finally counts in launching life to the heights of everyone’s dream.

Some thing about my three days

13th October 2010


The day was as usual but every one of our staff was in a hurry to leave the office for puja vacation. All of us were wishing each other a prosperous and joyful Dasahara & we all hoped to see each other on the opening day of our college i.e. on 27th October. But we all knew that we will miss one Miss Champa Nayak of our college on that day.

On the eve of Dasahara vacation Miss Champa, the junior lecturer in zoology tendered her resignation letter to the principal. She was the first among the lecturers to leave the job in quest of other avenues of life. Her resignation made us rethink about our future and career.

That evening almost all the staff left Govindapally for their native places but I stayed at Govindapally for two days more as my train reservation was for 15th Oct. I was doubly sad during those two days because I was all alone on the headquarters and further in this puja vacation I had to leave my wife at her paternal home as she was in the 6th month of her pregnancy. All were expecting a junior edition of my being and were very happy but for the next few months I had to live a solitary life.

That day I was looking at my wife when she was folding my dress and packing them up for the up-coming journey. She was looking very beautiful and with her presence not only the room and but also the whole house looked beautiful. But  inwardly I was sadder because  I had to miss her beauty and love for some time.

Tomorrow I shall set out for Balasore to leave my wife at her parents. It is true that during the carrying stage a wife needs her husband most by her side. But I am undone. I cannot stay with her nor she can. She had to go to her parents against her will. She can not stay with me at Govindapally till her delivery because the place is too remote. In addition, the naxals call strikes frequently and unexpectedly and as a result all sort of communication is disruppted all of a sudden. This grim situation can even linger for days together. Last but not the least the medical facility is also not so well.


My wife feels bitter at the thought of  her separation from me and the same is also with me. But which cannot be cured must be endured.

14th October 2010

The morning was full of household work. Everything had to be kept safely before locking the house for the next 10 days. The house had a leaking roof so in our absence the rain supposed to be a great threat to all the household items. When there was rain we used to displace the household articles to safety. The rainwater had a peculiar style to affect us depending its tempo. So it was somewhat unpredictable to determine the safe points of our house. So we had to take resort to Polythene sheets. That morning we covered the important appliances with polythene sheets and locked the doors. The hired taxi was ready and on the ‘S’-shaped jungle road we set out for the state-capital.

15th October,2010

I walked around the Bhubaneswar railway station holding gently the soft hands of my wife. She was walking with little difficulties. It was the sixth month of her pregnancy and her movement was little slow. We came out of the station to buy our lunch packets. The Big sign board of HOTEL RICH caught our eyes and at the same time the memory linked with that hotel also flashed in our mind. Once we both had been to that hotel. That day we were really in a hurry because our train was about to approach the station in less than an hour. But the waiter had taken a long time to serve the food as a result we had to gobble up the food in such a hurry that the meal seemed tasteless. This time we thought not to enter that hotel and bought our food instantly from a small Dhaba by the road side at a far lesser price.

Some words of appreciation and the after thought.

In an essay about “your class teacher” the students of my college wrote very highly of my teaching style and my over all personality. The words of appreciation seemed exaggerated with respect to my real sense of commitment and duty. For a few moments I felt about the important role a teacher plays in shaping the young minds of the students. A little effort also has a far-reaching influence on the minds of the students. So it becomes mandatory on the part of the teacher to disseminate the best ideas and the best life-skills to his students religiously. The selfless activities will go in giving a meaning to the new generation.

Staying in the remote parts of the tribal regions we have been accustomed to give our teaching service to the society. Sometimes the dream of a prosperous city life allures us and cause displeasure. Often a sense of frustration also grips but a spiritual interpretation of life lived here in the service of the backward sections of our society gives a profound self esteem.

It has been more than four years that we have stayed in a small village and have constantly rendered our service for educating the tribal youths. Life is full of routine activity. Two principals have been changed on transfer during these four years but we stay in the same station unchanged and unmoved. Every black cloud has its silver lining. The four years have taught us to be more like a teacher. The professional attitude of a teacher is slowly developed. The calm disposition and gravity of a teaching professional are gradually inculcated.

Training At RTI, Bhubaneswar.

All the junior lecturers and  PGTs of ST/SC Development Department of Govt of Orissa were called for a refresher course at ST/SC Research Training Institute at CRP square Bhubaneswar. The get-together of the old friends at the same place after a long time gap of 4 years was really a big treat. The Refresher course was simply a name and meeting each other was the real fun and game.However, some of the participants had come to the training programme leaving their families unattended in the remote pockets of KBK districts.So at times the memory of their family made them conscious to finish the course at once and move back to their work station as soon as possible.

During the course we happened to sit in the conference hall for 7 hours like the school children.It revived the old habit of our school days.The educational out put was spiced with a strong fellow-feeling. To some extent we had become more alert, more innovative and smart.The refresher course was capable of dispensing the student's point of view to the teachers who sat in the programme like the students of a school.

On that day I was completely drenched. The rain coat was of little use. And I had to cover another 40 kilometres on my bike. The road was lonely. Road side trees were the only visible companions. The rain was showering sporadically. On my way I saw a school boy walking in the direction of my journey . I stopped my bike near the boy and told him to come with me. He accepted my offer and placed himself on the back seat. We rode away and after covering two or more kilometres, the boy wanted to get down. I thought in my mind that as the boy belonged to a tribal community and they were not exposed to the CULTURED MANNERS of civilisation, expecting a word like 'THANKS' from him was meaningless. Without any such expectation of words of thanks, I left the boy at his destination. And before taking leave from the boy my eyes met with his eyes, suddenly a beautiful smile of happiness came from his heart and lit up his tender face. That beautiful expression on his face warmed my rain drenched being and I rode all the way without looking back remembering and weighing the emptiness of artificial cultured mannerism on one side with the pure human expression of heart.

Writing a book.

"Write a book which you often think to read but none has written it yet." This line touched my heart readily and made me write it in my blogpost. For a moment I pondered what things I have dreamt for and why I have

LOOKING ONE SELF AT THE MIRROR AFTER A FEW MONTHS

For the last few months I had not used the mirror to see my physical appearance intently. I mean, I used to comb my hair hurriedly and used to set out for my office. As a result I was not conscious of the age factor which had started to show its sign on my appearance. But recently after taking a little physical exercise when I viewed my sweating body on the mirror I saw that I looked very old and matured. I was startled for a moment because my body language, way of talking and behavior pattern which were seemingly youthful and teen-age-like mismatched my physical appearance. I soon realized that I have to adopt a composed disposition which will complement my appearance and in turn will earn more respect from others. My nature of job requires spending most of my time with the teen-agers. Consequently the effects and psychological influences of the youngsters lessen the seriousness which normally comes with the growing of age. I have never been serious or thoughtful about the time that has already been robbed of me. Such lack of seriousness makes life’s valuable time fly unnoticeably.

What should be the solution to such human failures? I had read somewhere that a habit of contemplation on a regular basis on one’s own life will beacon a right direction to live life more purposefully.

Moving towards Positivity.

Bringing our thinking process to nobler and more positive direction is always aspired for but this seemingly easy task can not be attained all of a sudden. The mind has to be lead inch by inch in the desired direction. A conscious effort is an essential factor for realizing this goal. Mind tends to be lazy and floats with the previously accustomed thought-flow. Such usual and habitual thinking processes set the human faculty languish in a limited sphere. The meaning of life is narrowed to few routine bound activities and as a result the higher aspects of life remain undiscovered and untapped. Most often most of the human beings love to remain as they are. But life is the name of change and our resistance to the unchangeable natural  law of change will not set us free from it. However, man can redirect his resistive potency to work upon facilitating his march towards a conscious evolution.

Good thoughts release higher powers. Tapping the creativity of human intelligence eliminates  ennui and emptiness of life which has become a characteristic mark of modern man. Our complacency and utter lazyness keep us revolving in a vicious circle directionless. To overcome such a habitative monotonous state a launching force has to be mustered and this accumulation of potency is best done by constant association with noble thoughts with creative edge to make life beautiful.

LIFE LIVED FOR TRIFLES.

The thinking faculty of most man run downward easily but to raise the level of mental thoughts is too difficult and needs consistency in efforts. Man loves to run in the opposite direction of his real goals and deliberately move away from self-realization. But sometimes, in some emotive situations of life he can not but thank the unseen force for endowing a life that is a mystery but bears testimony to a unspeakable divine beauty. At such moments of life man is awaken to cast his eyes to those supreme aspects of life to which he has always liked to neglect.

We neglect the higher values of life because we fear that we might be lost in the infinitude of a spiritual expansion. But a life lived for trifles is no use. The length of human life is so short-lived that the neglect of the higher possibilities of human conciousness is our greatest folly.

Today Evening

Today evening I feel inwardly happy and in the same proportion of my felt happiness I feel for others in a philanthropic zeal. This high spirits might have been induced by the two cups of strong tea which I have consumed this evening. Although the sky was cloudy and it was finely drizzling, I came out of my house and rode on my bike to Balimela square. I was alone or so to say I was left lonely because Mr. Bhoi and Mr. Patra had left for the market without waiting for me. In the evening I had dropped my tutorial class as most of the students had caught flu. I was careful because if I caught flu then it will surely affect my wife and the little one in her womb. Rain is conducive to growth of both disease and greenery. And I am affected by both of them. The wild plants around my quarter have grown so much and so irregularly that the growth looks like a mini jungle. A slender trail leads through the outgrowths to my house. I used to manoeuvr my bike on the twisted track to reach the veranda. I carefully ride my bike so I have never faced any accident while moving on the slimy trail. The trail leads from my house to a concrete road. The rain water and blue green algae have made the concrete dangerously slippery. And two times I have slipped very precariously on it. But for my bike's heavy leg-guard my knees and legs are still in working condition. This time this much. See you tomorrow.

My adjustment with the rain.

This year the rain brought much inconvenience to my family. The crying roof of the Government quarter wetted most clothes and the sunshine played hide and sick resulting half dried smelly clothes. And even spraying high doses of deoderant showed little effect. Practically, it was not an apt solution to the low-pressure caused monsoon rain, which lingered for days. In quest of a solution to my problem I went to the market to buy a big-sized tarpaulin sheet. I thought I will cover the entire roof and put an end to the annoying trouble instantly. But the easily approachable solution was postponed when the shop-keeper asked me about the intended size of the water proof material. I returned home to conduct a survey and measure the roof area. But that day I did not take up the survey and it is still pending. . . . . . . . The high-tech man of 20th century expects all solution to his problems in exchange of some paper money and any short of physical labour is postponed because we love to live on other's labour.

Hurt never, love ever.

To hurt someone's feelings is perhaps one of the most venial sins. Sin against others is sin against God. But we forget this truth now and then. To feed our ego many times we care not others' sentiments. If the other side is little obstinate then even a little matter easily and readily turns into a matter of bitter arguments and long lasting rancour. But after the heat subsides if an insightful analysis is made, our seer foolishness starts to float on surface. Any one with a little sense can realize that Life is short but we are engaged in the most unproductive and unhealthy sides of life. Such ill habits will drag life to utter futility. Let there be tolerance and the godly qualities of Jesus on cross, who could pray in his last painful moments for the redemption of the wrong-doers, who had crucified him. cross.

The pulsating baby in womb.

On 9th July, my wife was taken to the hospital for check up as she had conceived. I went with her to the ultra-sonography chamber. There I saw the embryonic form of my baby which was pulsating in the womb. A smile of happiness filled my lips. To see the baby in its pre-natal development was a pleasant treat for me.

A wake up call of 23 years back.

That night mother yelled with great pain and was rushed to the near by hospital.At that time I was a boy of 9 years and I could understand little about what happened. I was sitting on a chair in the hospital in a half sleepy state. My father took me to a doctors quarter and I slept there. Early in the morning father came and woke me up and told me that my mother had given birth to a baby-girl. I went to the hospital and discovered the new little guest wrapped in a white Turkish towel. I had to wait till she opened her eyes to give a cry for some liquid food. I remember that a piece of cotton was soaked in honey mixed water and that cotton had to be squeezed in her mouth to give her nourishment. The next day I found that the little human form had acquired great skill in sucking the cotton and there was no need to squeeze the cotton in her mouth. She sucked the honey-water from the cotton of her own accord. That little girl grew, went to school, then to college,learned to cover distance by driving car, actively became a part of my family and one day left her parental home , married and went away with her husband. 

Sweet memories  that came by way of her long stay of 23 years before my eyes are ever preserved with me and my other family members. The day I left her in her father's in law I thought I could have been more good towards her if I had known that how soon she will be away from me to take charge of  someone's family.

A simple thank at an unexpected hour.

The night was spent in the train compartment. The major enjoyment in the train was to take the food which is paddled inside the compartment. My last journey from Koraput to BBSR in the same train  was painful because nothing was available on board to take during the journey. But this time the situations had improved and few peddlers were selling their products to the physically less but psychologically more hungry travellers. In the morning of 26th I woke up when the train had already passed Berhampur station. At khorda road the compartment got packed with the daily passengers and the passengers with reservations had to shrink to make room  for the daily passengers. I was on my seat and a lady of age around 21 stood by my side. I didn't offered her to sit by my side for a few minutes then I felt the general courtesy in my mind and indicated her to sit by my side with a gentle wave of hand.It is true that such courtesy  is common,on the part of male passengers and in the same frequency it is equally common on the part of the modern girls to walk away without telling even a courteous thank to the passenger with the reservation .

When the destination came and I was about to leave the compartment I heard a beautiful voice coming from my back and thanking me in the sweetest manner for my recently shown courtesy. I was amazed and out of curosity asked my fellow traveller " Are you a student ?". She replied very politely, " No sir, I am a service holder in the Reliance company." I wished her all success in her service carrier while getting down  and at the same time I told myself, " Ma'am, it is because of girls like you only that the RELIANCE on women is still existing although very feebly.